…a brief glance…

it’s almost 7 in the morning and i have been up for hours. can you be up if you were never asleep?? hmmm!

yesterday i went to kaye’s house for mj’s 2nd birthday party. he’s sooooo cute!

after which i went home bound for the atster’s house to ring in her 34th birthday with her, and just before midnight she and wifey walked through the doors. we had a shot of jager-bombs before collapsing on the couch…through tiredness not alcohol! it was only a shot!

it’s funny, i was thinking pretty much all day yesterday that i had been home for a whole year. how time has flown and how so much has happened since. i can still remember stepping out of immigration and into the arrival section where the families wait for their loved ones and having my Mom, Ats and sister in law there. i remember driving home with my mom in awe that i was home. how everything looked so different and yet so exactly the same. i remember hugging my bed as soon as i walked into my room, and as a force of habit walking into the pantry and standing before it, as i had time countless of times, and it seemed at that moment, that no time had passed. i remember my sister’s riduculous attempts to keep me awake for some lame excuse, trying not to tell me of my surprise welcome home party… she didn’t think the mountains of food and overflowing supply of plastic dinner ware was not a dead giveaway! i remember pretty much my closest friends and family members were there, which was a little overwhelming, but totally comforting. the moment i had landed my phone had not stopped ringing. 

it’s hard to believe how time has flown so quickly. i remember my first year in london, it felt like time ticked by ever so slowly. it seems the older one gets, the quicker time passes.

remembering to a year back means remembering my mom. not that that doesn’t happen on the somewhat minutely basis, but more so. especially on the long drive to kaye’s house. could she really be gone? and for seven months in 11 days. writing in my sister’s card was a little difficult. how do you wish someone a happy birthday when you both know that there is a definitive void in their special day. birthday’s were a thing with my mom, it was her opportunity to spoil us more than she already did. around this time of the year she’d take us shopping, around this time she’d be shopping with me for a birthday outfit, as she has for as long as i can remember. she always bought my birthday outfit, and shopping for the outfit was our bonding moment. when i was away in london she still sent me my birthday outfits. one of many unspoken traditions that i will miss. and it hit me how much on thursday as i wandered around somewhat purposefully at macarthur square to pick up my sister’s present, and i had walked passed Colorado…where most of my birthday outfits were purchased, and it took me back to a year ago when we were there on a thursday night trying on outfits, and i remember one of the sales lady mentioned that she was bound for europe and of course my mother jumps on the band wagon and informs the lady that i had just arrived and had been there for two years, blah blah blah. mother’s pride i could almost detect, which she usually reserves for when we’re not in the room.  

today we’re having a birthday lunch for my sister at her house. we have family and friends coming over. which will be nice. we don’t all see each other as much as we used to. it’d be nice to just hang.

for my birthday, i had considered having a get together here at at’s but, i don’t know. i just don’t quite feel it. i know that i wouldn’t have anything at home, it just feels too weird. that the elephant would definitely be visible. so this year shall be a low key one. after all, it’s only my 29th. next year is the biggie! this year, dinner with the family, and dinner with friends on another evening (thanks banans for taking the reigns).

well might try to catch some zzzzz’s.  xxKie