…a brief glance…

so the rest of july went by rather in a blur, with one event after another, and now august is almost finished. how time is just passing by so quickly, and how so much has happened, yet it feels like not much has moved.

i miss my mom. i mean that’s a daily thing, but these last couple of weekends, i really have. for no special reason, just every day stuff. i find it hard to speak of her in the past sense, mainly because saying it out loud, would mean admitting to it.

my at’s moved this weekend, to a really nice house dubbed ‘the crap shack’, for all of it’s un-new-ness, it feels very homey and definitely full of potential. as great as it was to have a new project, something new. it was a little sad to think that this is the first of many things that my mom would not have been a part of from the start.

life is progressing, for all of us, in our own ways. everyone is busy. kuya and i are hardly ever home. he’s busy at work, and my activities keep me busy for most of the week, leaving a day/evening or so at home. perhaps it subconscious, but very little time is spent at the blair athol home. a part of me still cannot walk through the front door if one can prevent it.

that being said, brother and i have developed a routine in our co-exististence in the house. we check in, queries my whereabouts, whether the other guardian has custody of me for the evening, confirms if i’ve been fed and vice versa.

the business is coming along promising-ly. got a couple of things lined up. my biz partner is like 38 weeks pregnant so we’re all waiting in anticipation for Baby Lee to grace us with her presence.

mic leaves for dubai this weekend, and it surreal to watch him get ready to go. it’s going to be hard to say goodbye… mic is one of those friends that i’ve had since i was like ten, and is ever present at almost every significant days of my life. he and ruby we’re the first friends who came to see me while i was in london, just before i settled down, but just after i passed panic mode.   

brother’s birthday is coming up, and shortly after mom’s birthday, and the consensus is that if the Forest Lawn people want to hold a prayer night for mom on her birthday at our house, then we will hold one, because that’s what she would want. it’s hard to comprehend that she’s gone, let along the amount of time that has passed since she has. sometimes i forget that she is, maybe it’s wishful thinking because not a day passes that i don’t feel her absence in my life.