…a brief glance…

greetings from me as i sit here in my office on Easter Saturday. i can hear you utter the words ‘what are you crazy?’ … the answer is, pretty much! but who can really pass up the over time when she is only at work 2/3 days a week with Uni to pay for and a trip to the Phils to prepare for. financially as well as mentally! har har!

it has been a crazy few weeks let me tell you. colour conference was a great experience and i loved the opportunity i had to spend it with my oldest friend ever, as well as my new founds friends from connect. it was a nice balance of new and old. that sunday we also had the hillsong album recording where i went with the posse and posse-lets (jill & mootzter),  afterwards we had dinner at saigon bowl! another saigon favourite!

a big, huge PERK for me was about two weeks ago i got to see chris and nat from my h’smith connect family. they were here for chris’ graduation… congrats man! so proud of you! it was soooo great to see them both. to talk to them both. nat and i had a really good chat which made me miss her even more. it was an awesome evening, and i am soooo pleased to have seen them!

on an exciting note: my cousin mela and her fiance emmar we’re married on 29th March! looking at the photos, she looked beautiful! very happy for them both.

my dear dear dear dear friends brent and dani (aka B & D) were also matrimoniously (is that a word)  joined on wednesday 4th april! how cool is that! you two have been such an amazing inspiration to and testimony for god’s amazing plans. b, just think when we were first flatties at bembridge, you were talking of this girl and now she’s not only your wife, she’s my friend whom i love soooo much! you lucked out with her buddy! you do right by her ok! otherwise you got me and ashe on your back! =)

*sigh*

unfortunate events of the last few weeks includes the death of a really good friend’s grandfather and having to attend his funeral. which admittedly was hard, for all the wrong reasons. i felt bad because as sad as i felt for my friend, and how i understood what she was going through, all that was happening in my head was i was reliving my mom’s funeral.

then this week my grandmother slipped, fell and ended up in the emergency room at campbelltown hospital. talk about having to face your fears. i met with my tita pat at the hospital, knowing how hard it was going to be, for her, for all of us… being in a very familiar situation, so soon after recent tragedies. i had prepared myself for how hard it was going to be, but i wasn’t quite prepared to see my grandma on a hospital bed, looking strikingly like my mother that night we had brought her in. it totally felt like someone had knocked the wind out of me. as my tita and i conversed we tried very hard to be stronger, for each other… as i am sure we were both about to fall apart. being in the hospital where my mother worked meant that our faces would be recognised, and the name would be familiar, and when the penny dropped and connection between the two were made, the look the would creep on their face was a mixture of moritifcation and sadness. which inevitably set me to tears.

i have admittedly haven’t spent that much time in the hospital… i find it hard to be there. the smell, the familarity, the lingering sadness… i can’t describe it. i know it’s hard for all of us, and i totally commend tita pat’s abillity to be there all the time, i just can’t. every time i am in a hospital, regardless what it is for, i find it hard to breathe, hard to concentrate and sit still. perhaps it’s because everything’s still so fresh, who knows. we all have haunting images in our minds of the hospital from that night, for my ats it’s a certain sounds that trigger in her head the moment she sets foot in a hospital. for me it’s the smell amongst other things.

so that’s pretty much it… easter is pretty quiet this year obviously due to recent events. we’re gathering on monday for the 11th monthly gathering. we’re having a picnic on site at forest lawn.

happy easter… let us NOT forget what these few days represent, and how huge of a price was paid for our existence. be blessed!