…a brief glance…

Happy New Year! 2005 brings with it a lot of promises. New hopes, dreams, and resolutions. At times it’s easy to get caught up in the resolution, what we want to accomplish, or what we want to avoid in the coming year. The new year brings the opportunity to start anew. To determine to not make the same mistakes, to set goals and determine to achieve them.

2004 was a huge year for me. Early in the year I had made the decision to finally stop dreaming about going to London, and just go! I booked my ticket before getting a Visa. An impulse brought on by a really bad day at work, but it was the best decision I ever made in terms of making a decision. Had I waited to get my Visa, I would probably still be postponing it. Booking my ticket made the decision real. Two thousand dollars does that. The following months was filled with a mixture of denial, excitement, apprehension, and anticipation. My first big trip, my life long dream. I had dreamt about it for so long, and even written about what the experience was going to be like, that it was as though I had already done it. Was I in for a shock when it finally happened?

Saying goodbye at work felt like I was leaving behind what had become a family unit. Rob certainly made our little OSU team feel like a family. I can say this now that I am so far away and can fully appreciate it…but Rob nurtured our little team. Spoiled us in many ways…and vice versa. Seeing Rob’s reaction as he saw our lolly jar filled with red raspberries was always fun to watch. MPC provided many friends of whom I treasure to this day.

My farewell party followed shortly after, which was a weird experience all together, and no not because of the amount of shots had that night, but because I knew the party was for me, and that there were pretty signs (courtesy of Jes – which I have to point out were still there when I left for the airport Philippine bound, wonder if it’s still there), it didn’t seem real. Saying goodbye to most of my friends that night felt like I was just saying goodnight. I remember blogging for the very first time on my “d’cooksterztrip journey”, which is always hilarious to look back on and read.

The days and nights that followed were filled with last minute arrangements. Last dinners, lunches, and meetings! I remember sitting in my Mom’s formal dining room on the night before I left. After Grace and my Kuya Arnold had gone home, I was sitting around the table with my nearest and dearest friends…Ann, Jes, Mer and Nige. Our little posse, and honorary posse member (sorry Nige)! We sat around talking as we had time and time before. Gas bagging about this and that. It was pointed out repeatedly that I was leaving, not that it sunk in or anything.

The turn out at the airport was extremely touching. I think almost every significant person in my life was there. From my immediate family (Stitch included), my Posse, to my high school best friend Jade, my cousins…not to mention my other cousins and Aunt had come that morning to say goodbye at the house. My departure finally hit home as I got ready to board. Tears were shed to say the least. All my sister’s fault! My palms were sweaty, my heart was racing. I was torn between excited and freaked out. Though I was upgraded into business class, thanks to my favourite brother, I have to say crying my eyes out dampened the experience.

Philippines was an experience. For so long I referred to Phils as home, and though it was something I had realised in my last trip, home it isn’t. I love my cousins and my Aunts, but my future lay elsewhere. My heart no longer yearned to be there as it once did. I was able to hang out with some of my cousins and Aunts, and enjoyed those times immensely, however I was waiting for my next adventure to begin with anticipation. When the time finally came and I had to say goodbye to my Mom and my brother at the airport along with my other family I fell apart!

London was definitely harder than I had anticipated through my naivety. At the same time, as hard as all that was, and how much easier things would have been had I done them differently, I believe its all part of the journey I am meant to take. Each road leads somewhere, and what you encounter along the way is part of the journey. The lessons you learn, brings you to the next level. The next part of your path. God has a plan for us, and each circumstance we face is a part of it all, however it is through the choices we make that determine how we get to the destination.

After a few weeks of getting no where in terms of finding a job and a place to live, by August I was contemplating accepting defeat and going home. But first I needed to see the one place I have always wanted to see…Italy! Lucky for me in Italy, I had connections. Thanks to Kuya Arnold and Ate Grace. For Cristina and Lorena, my beloved friends from Finsbury Residence. I loved Italy.

By the time I arrived back to London I was ready to give London another try. I figured London had won the first round, but the game wasn’t over till I quit, and I wasn’t ready to quit just yet. I gave myself a dead line, and Praise God a couple of weeks before my dead line was up, I got Pell and Bales, which lasted a couple of weeks before I got offered Harper Collins…a publishing company no less. How awesome is that…the job is hardly glamorous…actually not at all, but it’s my foot in the door. It enabled me to look for a place of my own to live, and I have met some really cool people there. Who shall remain nameless because they’ll just get a big head. If you’re reading this, you know I mean you!

The year ahead is an exciting one, and I cannot wait for what it holds. It’s limitless and I am determined to make it an awesome year ahead. To live each day fully. To leave what was in the past in the past and look right ahead, for what is ahead is bright…so 2005 bring it on.